clueless rant

i am absolutely speechless here..clueless to rant!:( something maybe missing with me. i knew it but what can i do? my mind is wandering and the heart is wondering!:) i fervently pray to have courage to expressed how i felt but am so weak when i hear-see him/her. i know would be the one to suffer this agony and rather flow it the way than hurting myself.:( gosh am i talking heart here?mmm..whatever!:)